Abortion – supporting your partner


Table of Contents

This information is intended for men who are supporting their partner’s abortion decision.

At the Women’s, we strive to provide women with complete information regarding the process during their medical consultation. This allows her to ask inquiries and express her concerns while also being treated with respect and decency. If she has specific anxieties or concerns that you are unable to address, you might advise her to seek additional help through the Pregnancy Advisory Service.

This page contains the following information:

  • Assistance in the real world
  • Emotional assistance
  • What your partner might think if you had an abortion


  • Concerning the vagina, there are a lot of folklores and fallacies. A number of people believe that a vagina can lose the pliability and turn out to be loose continually. In reality, that’s not true.
  • The vaginal muscles are elastic as a result, they can expand to house almost everything coming in, for instance, can accommodate the penis or even sex marble not forgetting things moving out of the vagina like the baby. But all those cannot make it stay loose forever as it’s capable of tightening back to its previous shape.
  • It’s undeniable that your vagina may turn out to be somewhat looser via ageing or even child birth, but generally, the muscles tend to enlarge and draw in as they are elastic.
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Assistance in the real world

Any practical assistance you can provide your partner at this time will be greatly appreciated.

  • Offer to assist with expenses such as operation fees, blood tests, and hospital bills.
  • Read the medical information sheet regarding post-abortion care that was given to her by staff and store it in a safe place.
  • Offer to drive her to the hospital and to pick her up after the procedure is over. This is especially important if she’s had a general anaesthetic, as she won’t be able to drive for at least 24 hours thereafter. Women must have a support person who can be contacted and who can pick them up after the surgery, according to the Women’s.
  • You might be able to be with her during treatment, depending on the operation she’s undergoing.
  • She may feel nauseous or weary afterward; while she recovers, assist her with childcare, cooking, or other household responsibilities.
  • Inquire as to what she wants to do after she gets home – sleep, relax, or talk?

Emotional assistance

Before, during, and after the abortion, emotional support will be important to her.

  • Let her know you’ll be there for her during and after the abortion.
  • If she wants to talk about her decision, offer reassurance and listen.
  • She may be comfortable about the surgery, and your presence may make her feel more at ease.
  • Please take care of yourself. Recognize what you’ve been through and take a break.

What your partner might think if you had an abortion

Accept that your partner may experience a range of emotions and varied sentiments about the abortion, both positive and negative.

On the plus side, she might think:

  • a reassertion of her power over her life
  • You’ve become closer as a result of the experience.
  • She is more knowledgeable about fertility and contraception.
  • says she wishes to have a child when the time is appropriate
  • more at ease when it comes to making important decisions
  • She feels relieved that she has made her decision and can now move on.

She might, on the other hand, feel:

  • A sense of grief at the conclusion of the pregnancy Sadness does not always imply that she has made the incorrect choice. It could just be a recognition of a difficult decision.
  • concerned about her health or the impact of her decision on your relationship
  • She feels guilty since her decision may be viewed negatively by society or a member of her community.
  • She may be enraged at you because she bears a greater share of the blame for the decision, or she may be enraged with herself for being pregnant.
  • If she felt there was a lack of support from those around her, she would be disappointed.

It can be helpful to be able to express these feelings in a safe, supportive, and non-judgmental atmosphere to keep them from becoming overwhelming. According to research, when women are given the freedom to make their own decisions and are supported in doing so, they are more likely to feel relieved and confident in their choices.

In addition to talking to you, she may find it beneficial to share her feelings with sympathetic friends or family members. If she is having trouble managing her feelings, she should seek help from Social Work for post-abortion counseling or referrals to other qualified counsellors.


Abortion – supporting your partner

This information is intended for men who are supporting their partner’s abortion decision. At the Women’s, we strive to provide women with complete information regarding